I am taking watercolor lessons and I'll be using this blog to post pictures of my creations and thoughts.
11.26.2006
Burning candles and time
My oldest son, Jared, is almost 13 and seems like an adult already. He's such a helper and I don't know what I could do without him. He certainly helped a lot with Thanksgiving dinner! I have been so busy lately, between working a full time job and trying to take classes, that I don't have as much time as I'd like to spend at home with my boys. The other day, after I had drug myself home after a day of work and class afterward, he asked me if I would make him some soup. He had gotten out the can, the can-opener, the pot, two bowls and two spoons..... I realized he didn't just want me to make him something to eat and I know he wasn't being lazy because he saved me time by getting everything ready. He wanted me to take care of him and he wanted me to eat with him. He does so much to help out voluntarily that I tend to forget he needs to know that I will still do something for him.... even if he could do it himself. He has been so helpful in taking care of his brother and I knew he deserved recognition for that. I bought him a cell phone last Christmas and he has been using it wisely. He spends more minutes taking to me than anyone else and I'll never cut that line. It's so nice to hear him tell me about his day at school but mostly he just wants me to talk to him.
My youngest son, Riley, has been challenging his teachers again. He has to be their biggest challenge! This fussy boy can't sit still and everything hurts his feelings or hurts his ears or is scratchy on his skin. He doesn't like crowded rooms filled with noisy kids and is constantly getting in trouble for trying to get out of such a situation. He wants to be first in line or the last in line and is always clowning around. He's always so emotional and will tell you exactly how you hurt his feelings. I've been reading a lot of parenting books lately and I hope I'll find something to help me figure this boy out. When he's at home he is so sweet. He wants to go for a walk at -24 degrees to look at the moon and what phase it's in or to check out something else in the sky. He can sit at the piano and pick out a tune he heard in school (although he says he doesn't want to take lessons)....A TV commercial comes on playing a jazzy tune and he's say "come on mom, dance with me." He draws like Picasso and sings like an angel. It seems to me that no one sees what I do in this boy. I really think he's going to grow up to be someone special. I wish people wouldn't feel like they need to mold him into their idea of an average kid. The average kid would probably be sitting inside at -24 degrees, not exploring the landscape and commenting on how the snow glitters like white gold when the moon is out.
Riley will be Riley.....and I've got my hands full.
I guess I've accomplished more than I thought in my life. These boys really are something to be proud of. I just feel like I've lost so much time. I should be more educated and should have experienced more. There is so much to see and do. There are people in their 20's that are in positions over my head. I know it's because I had my kids when most where in college. I know I don't regret having my boys when I did and being home with them when they are little but I wish I could get there I want to without feeling like I can't have time for them now.
Well, I'll just keep plugging along and hopefully I'll have a lot more to talk about before I am 40!
10.08.2006
10.06.2006
Update
I'm starting another washcloth called the "Garter Stitch Lace Facecloth". I'm using some yarn I found on clearance at JoAnn's called Bellezza Collection Smania in "Berry Multi". I can't find my size 6 needles right now so I'm using my 7's and not sure I like how loose it is. We'll see if this thing gets very far without getting ripped out.
We had our first snow so now my garden is mush ;O( Now I need to go out there and clean up my beds before we have a snow that sticks.
I joined a new bookclub called Paperback Swap. So far I'm really enjoying it!
My oldest son is doing great in school this year. He tested really high at the end of last year (6th grade) so he will be taking the SAT in September. He may qualify for a scholarship! He could also take some college classes duing the summer if he passes the SAT. He's been working really hard to keep up his grades since I told him I would buy him a laptop ONLY if he gets all A's and no more than 4 B's this year. The more A's the better the computer! He's missed getting in a couple of assignments on time so he's trying to get all the extra credit he can. It's nice to see him try so hard. I'm hoping he will like the recognition he'll get for getting in the honor roll and will keep it up. I can't always buy him something big like that but there will always be upgrades and accessories for the darned thing.
I have a hair appointment on the 10th and I'm thinking about cutting it short again. I'm thinking of doing another Faith Hill haircut.

9.09.2006
Finished!

That was actually very easy. Now I just have to figure out if I just snip off the ends or if I need to weave them in...
Below is a picture of the wool I bought in Denali. They only had one skein of the variegated so I bought one complementing color. They were pretty expensive I thought at $14 each!

9.08.2006
More to love about Denali





9.04.2006
Denali National Park




8.26.2006
More pictures

This is a bachelor button that I didn't plant. I love them though so it was welcome in my garden.
Gladiolus close up. They are so beautiful. It got really cold a couple nights ago so I cut them all and put them in a tall vase with some of my delphiniums. It made a very striking arrangement.
Mystery flower #2 I'm not sure what this is and it's definitely not something I planted. It is very pretty though.
I have never seen nastursums like these. The yellow with red streaks is very pretty!
I planted Forget-me-nots--Alaska's state flower--but this is the only one that I saw actually flower.
I planted this yellow rose for my mom. She loves yellow roses. She wanted to come up to visit this year but didn't make it. Maybe next year.
These are the dark red lilies that I thought would be a different color. I don't know what happened to the other colors. They looked very pretty from the road next to my white fence.
One of my delphiniums. I really loved the white one but it didn't last long enough to get a picture.
8.25.2006
My garden

I really didn't work very hard to make my garden beautiful this year. I spent nearly all of my time studying so I am really shocked at how pretty it ended up being. I took some pictures last week and then some more this afternoon. Some of the flowers are a bit of a mystery to me since I don't think I planted them. I guess I forgot to take pictures of my tulips that came up. They were very pretty. I also planted a white rose, a yellow rose, two ground cover roses in variegated pink and a wine. I also planted several gladiolus bulbs, poppy, sunflower, and nasturtium seeds. I planted 3 lilies last year which came back up this year but I planted three different colors: dark red, white, and a pale pink. I had three lilies coming up where I planted them about 3 to 4 feet apart but all of them were dark red. So I'm confused as to how that happened. At least they are still pretty and the dark red was stricking against my white rail fence.




8.20.2006
My newest hobby

Look how long it is! I only worked on it for a couple of hours and that includes the times I ripped it out and started over! Too bad my friend wants it to be 7 feet long!!!!!!!

My rows are a little wavy but if you screw with it a little bit it staightens up.
I'm back.....
I planted bulbs last fall and a few of them actually came up this spring/summer. I really enjoyed the beautiful red/white stripped tulips that came up. It was pretty exciting alhtough it's sad if you consider how many I actually planted. Well, maybe they will come up next year. I planted some red gladiolus bulbs early his spring and they are starting to bloom now dispite the constant rain. He had a burst of sunlight today so I ran out and took a couple pictures that I will have to post later. The clouds started to move around though, casting giant shadows across the yard, so it was pretty short lived and I only got a couple of shots.
I also planted a bunch of seeds this summer. I didn't get them started inside like I planned so I just scattered them outside. I planted a bunch a nastursims which look beautiful right now. A lot of them are low growing and all red. Then others were vining and the typical shades of orange and yellow. They look great. I also planted some sun flowers which are nearly as tall as I am but have yet to form a head. I don't know why my sunflowers never bloom. One of them snapped from the weight of the rain on them. I kept running out and shaking them to get the water off and my neighbor said it looked like I was choking the plants.
The kids were able to play outside during that burst of sun. I really thought it was going to dump on them! They are definitely Alaskan kids though. It could be cold, damp, and windy and they would be out there in the ball fields trying to get a makeshift baseball team together.
They are going to miss summertime but I think they miss the winter too. Winter means back to school but it also means they wont be bored anymore. They will be able to catch up with kids they haven't seen all summer and meet knew kids. They enjoy that. Riley's teacher seems like a nice lady. She is very calm....... I don't think she'll yell at the kids like some of the others do. That will be good for a kid who is highly emotional! I'm sure I'll make up for her after he gets home haha
Jared.........oh my..........my son is going into middle school. He'll be 13 in April and I'm NOT READY for that. I don't want my boys to be separated. I don't want Jared to have to walk to school, especially in the winter. I don't want to worry about who he's going to make friends with. When we were walking around that school I saw the girls there that were obviously showing the boys what clothes they woudln't get away with wearing after school starts. This one girl turned around and I wanted to cover my son's eyes. The waist of her pants had been ripped off and I could see her butt crack! Gross. I just looked at him and he gave me a look like "I know mom, don't talk to her." He's a good kid but I'm still scared.
6.05.2006
HAIR! Can't live with it.....
can't live without it. Well, at least it would be scary without it. I myself, have too much of it. I have scheduled an appointment for a mystery cut. I have NO IDEA what I'm going to do. Part of me wants to go short and sassy but part of me is liking the long prettier hair. That's really very unlike me.... I'm not sure what's up with that. I really hate to cut it since I paid a small fortune for the color job. I had her mix a little red (think of red like a car not like a carrot..like the picture to the left here) in with my normal carmel highlights and I LOVE it. It seems to blend well with my natural colors as well as with the highlights I love. I think next time I go for more of the red. But for the cut I have no idea......
I'm sure I'll end up with something completely different but we'll see...
Recent happenings, including snow in June!
Well, I'm pretty sure it will warm up sooner or later....... or at least once, just before fall. For now this is actually good for me because this not-so-nice weather will most likely keep me inside studying instead of outside playing.
On anoher note, I did finally have a good review at work. I was really shocked! I was so used to the constantly negative and nitpicking reviews that intead of grinning and being glad at first I was waiting for the huge "but..." to drop down on my good mood...and preparing myself. I was pleasantly surprised! I actually got a 6% raise too. That's better than the 4% that is the norm these days. I have been working my butt off to keep up though so I'm glad they noticed!
Well I better get back to studying.....
4.13.2006
something a little lighter
4.12.2006
my grandmother
I'm dealing with it a bit better now although things will never be the same. I used to write to her every couple of weeks and now I have all of this stationary left... I don't know who to use it for now. When I went to the last stamping get together I made these Easter cards because I knew she would love them. They looked like something she would have picked out at the store. Now it's time to send out the cards and I just can't....... I made them for her and now I can't even send her one. Easter Sunday will be so sad. I always called and talked to her.
4.07.2006
stuff
I miss her already.
4.04.2006
Fabric care symbols
No wonder some people don't ever wash their clothes. They aren't really homeless they just can't read the darn tags!
4.02.2006
Parkinson disease
I was hoping I could see my grandmother one more time before she died... but now it's too late. I don't want to see her like this and have that image the predominate one over all of my memories. I wish there was something I could do to make things easier for her.
I felt awful for not sending the card I bought for her a couple weeks ago. My mom said I should just stop sending letters now. She wont get them now. She said you can't understand what she says at all anymore. The last thing she said that anyone could understand was "I want to go home to my room". My aunt asked her if she meant the nursing home and she told her no, she meant HER room at HER home (at the farm that is now sold).
I think she's suffered enough now. Her Angel needs to take her home...........
FALLEN
Lyrics by Bree Sharp
Music by Bree Sharp and Don Dilego
©1998 Trauma Records
Lucy is gazing out into space
She has starry eyes, starry eyes that light up her face
Like an angel
Little girl, little girl questioning me
She says, 'why doesn't everyone have what they need?'
Where are the angels, angels, angels?
Where are the angels, angels, angels?'
I cannot tell you my little darling
All my faith has fallen, fallen, fallen
The stars in Lucy's eyes run down her cheek
Like teardrops of fire, still her voice is as sweet
As an angel
She says, 'where is the place that the good souls go
Where they take away, take away the pain that they know
Where are the angels, angels, angels?
Where are the angels, angels, angels?'
I cannot tell you my little darling
All my faith has fallen, fallen, fallen
Ashes, ashes, all fall down
Ashes, ashes, all fall down
If I could take the world in my arms
I'd take all the wrong and I'd fly
Yes, I'd like to know
Where the good souls go
Where are the angels, angels, angels?
Where are the angels, angels, angels?
I cannot tell you my little darling
All my faith has fallen, fallen, fallen
I cannot tell you my little darling
All my faith has fallen, fallen, fallen
3.26.2006
UGH, Monday so soon?
Today we slept in and then my husband took me to Sourdough Sam's for pancakes. YUM! We haven't done that for a while and it was great! Now I'm trying to finish up the laundry and puzzle out the baby blanket I'm crocheting. It is very frustrating. The pattern gets very vague when you get to the trim. I just ripped out two rows and now I am counting stitches and looking ahead to see where the next row will fall otherwise the scalloped trim doesn't line up evenly. I remember having this trouble when I made it last time. I am trying to take notes this time!
I wish I didn't have to go to work tomorrow :O(
3.05.2006
Someone help me up!
Friday, I took my son's violin into the music store to get the bridge fixed and while there I checked out the electric guitars they had. I'd been thinking about trading my acoustic in for one. I'd been having such a hard time playing the acoustic. It was very difficult to form the chords and impossible to switch to another after I had it. I figured it just needed a neck adjustment and after talking to the guys there I decided to take it in and let them look at it. They looked the guitar over and said the action was way too high which meant the strings were too high off the fret board. They adjusted the neck but said the bridge also needed sanding down some and said that changing to lighter weight strings would also help. Either way it seemed like a lot of the problem I was having was because of the size of the body and so many of the songs I wanted to play were actually performed on an electric. My husband had also bought me a neat computer program a while back for learning guitar but it was for electric. So I stood there and drooled over these electric guitars.
Actually, there was one guitar in particular that I just loved but I knew it was probably way too expensive. It's smaller so it seems like it would be just perfect for me! Also it was the only one that wasn't black or too crazy looking. It's stained a beautiful teal blue color and has a solid maple neck. I took some pictures with my cell phone to show my husband but I knew he would not be too excited when he heard how much. Also, I had found out the trade-in value for my acoustic was not very much. I told him about it but by bedtime I had decided to just let them fix up my other guitar and stick with that a while longer.
When I woke up the kids said my husband had been called in to work. I didn't think anything of it since he'd also had to work a little the last couple of weekends but I wondered why he didn't wake me up when he left..... and when he came rolling up at only 10:30 am I wondered why he didn't work for very long. He burst in the house all worked up because he said R (younger son) had left his to-go box from Boston's in the back seat of the car. I took off to go get it and it was sitting on top of a black zip-up guitar case with a small amp box (which is amazing for such a little thing!). I almost cried but worked really hard at holding back the tears since I know he hates that. It is soooooooooo beautiful! My camera is still broke (which I will NOT complain about ever again) but I found some pictures of the same guitar on ebay.




Doesn't that color just make you think of beautiful turquoise waters like these?
My husband said the girl at the store recommended this little amp because it has a lot of neat effects, one of them being acoustic. So even though he went ahead and traded in my acoustic I still get the sound when I want it. This amp isn't much bigger than a car battery but it is a lot lighter. I can also put a battery in it and take it with me. He said I could use it to practice in the park. Hmmmmmmmm does that mean he doesn't want to hear me practice???
2.27.2006
Jack Johnson
2.25.2006
A Letter
The chair in which you've sat's not just a chair nor the table at which you've eaten just a table nor the window that you've looked from just a window.
All these have now a patina of your body and mind, a kind of ghostly glow which haloes them a little, though invisible.
~Iain Crichton smith
2.22.2006
The season just before spring...
Well, I just realized that I might actually have a life! I have several things planned for the next week or so. I actually had to plan out a schedule to keep track of everything. wow. Pretty soon it will be interesting when classes start. I would like to take a beginning sewing class also if I can fit that in. I have a sewing machine now....and I have material........ but that doesn't make me a seamstress! So far I have only sewn a washcloth together. Hmmmmmm maybe I could sell that on ebay....
2.20.2006
Lonely alone time
My parents called me on Sunday. It was good to talk to them but they always say something about my nanny which leaves me sad for a long while after. I always ask for more specific details of her condition and they always give me one of those vague, you-know-she's-old type of answers... then they told me she said she wanted to see me one more time before she died. That just kills me because I just don't have the money to buy a plane ticket to Georgia. Then of course I feel like I couldn't go without taking the boys to see Grandma and everyone else and heck, why not bring Chris too. Hmmmm, maybe I could sell some organs or something to pay for that.
Okay, time to pull out of that downward spiral.... I had a great time shopping with my friend even though I would have liked some more time. I did find some neat journals on sale. They are suede with contrasting stitching and a little photo pocket on the front. I just fell in love with them and bought one in each of 4 colors: a sage green, red, champagne, and black. After I got home and unloaded my booty I was surprised when my oldest son asked for one of them- the black one. I asked what he planned to do with it (since he doesn't like to write anything -especially homework). He told me some stuff and I finally gave him one but I wouldn't be surprised if I don't find it later untouched, in a pile under his bed. Funny thing is that my youngest son started asking me more about "journaling". I told him what I do with mine and a few things others might do differently. He then asked if he could have my red one. UGH. I had to let him have it. I guess I will be making another trip to Joann's soon. Surprisingly though, I tripped on his little butt trying to get to the bathroom and he was laying on the floor writing away in his journal. A little later he asked me if I'd like to read it and I did. He wrote about last President's Day when I kept them home from school mistakingly thinking it was a day they had off too. He said we did a lot of fun things like playing around on the computer together and drinking hot cocoa. I wonder if he will write about the things we did today next year.
2.05.2006
I say ... and you think ... ?
- Taking sides:: middle ground
- Couples:: salt and pepper/ apples and oranges
- Right of refusal:: property
- Marla:: crazy friend
- Multiple:: talents
- Trinity:: Holy
- Sneeze:: Bless you
- Sweatpants:: comforts of home
- Steve:: phone
- Fabulous:: Bonnie
Sunday so soon


I was really impressed with the violinist (Giora Schmidt) who didn't show himself at the end, unless I missed him. We were only graced with the presence of Zuill Bailey and his long hair. I do admit he was great at the cello (which is normally my favorite sound) but I've never heard anyone play the violin like Schmidt. J said violinist aren't supposed to play sitting down. I said it looked like violinist could play anyway they chose. Several times as they amazed us I jabbed my son's shoulder to say "You could do that" but he didn't seem so sure. They were selling CD's afterward but I was not very happy with the selection. It was all Bailey. I still ended up with two and Mr. Zuill signed them both.
My son enjoyed the concert put on by the Fairbanks Concert Association and said we should buy season tickets next year. Maybe we will.
After we got home I took the medication and I don't remember a thing that happened afterwards. I'm only just now waking up and in a blink it will be Monday again. Such a shame.
Education
I want to get started right away but can't help but wonder where the money will come from. I had planned to learn to play guitar this summer, complete many projects and to read several books. I guess I better get cracking on those before summer hits.
1.30.2006
Today and yesterday
Yesterday I refinished my kitchen chairs. My husband helped me (thank God!). I don't know what I would have done without him. After the seat is recovered you can't find the original screw holes so he had to make new ones. It really looks so different...... which is not so bad. I really liked the way they looked before but this is good too. Now they have a pattern to them that shouldn't show stains as bad but they still look classy. I think I'll make the kids eat under the table as an extra precaution. Now that I know how to do it.......I never want to do it again!
1.22.2006
Is it spring yet????
Anyway, my backyard garden in taking shape in my mind. I can't wait until I can plant again.
1.21.2006
Lonely birthday party
We still had fun by ourselves though. Dad said it was actually pretty cool that we got to eat the ice cream cake all by ourselves. That got a laugh out of the little man. Than he and his brother had a blow horn battle. They also called Gram. She always seems to make things better.
The oddest thing of the day was the mystery dead fish in his tank. He was all in a panic saying, "which one is it, which one is it" with his eyes scrunched closed. None of his fish are mising. It's a pretty small fish. I'm wondering if his guppies had a baby and we just never noticed.
1.19.2006
BRRRRR!
My youngest son's birthday was today. He's been a little butthead too. I rushed my butt all over town to get him a few gifts since what we ordered online will be coming late and he seemed very ungreatful. He seemed disappointed that he didn't get any new video games. He may just be tired. He had a busy day. I think he'll really enjoy his gifts if he takes the time to check them out. His birthday party is Sat but I'm not real sure we will get many people to show up. It's been soooooooooo cold and people dust don't want to go anywhere they don't have to. The cold is supposed to last for a while too.
I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens. I guess we can have another party later if no one shows up.
I got my butterfly watch that my husband bought me on QVC today. I love it! I just wish it didn't say it was almost midnight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1.12.2006
SloooOOooooow going days
I really am glad to be back to work though. I love my time off but after a while I start to get bored at home and I tend to get lazy and waist my time. I do have a lot of projects planned but if they are spread out over weekends I don't get burned out so fast. My bookshelf project is sitting unfinished for that reason.... I just lost steam and inspiration. If I focus my mind on something else for a while I'll be able to get more creative when I need to be. Now that I've had a week I'm starting to think of some idea's to use for that project to make it more fun in the "fishy" room.
The boy who lives in the "fishy" room is having a 9th "fishy" birthday party on Saturday the 21st. So I have some planning to do for that this weekend. We have already done whales and a rainbow fish cake. This years theme is a shark. I have to figure out if I can make a shark cake or if I should have one made or do something else. I could also just do an aquarium cake to make things easier.
I am really loving this new computer with the media center. It's all tied in the with the TV so I can set it to record shows I want to watch after I get home. I love watching my DIY shows after dinner. Now I'm ready to crash.
1.08.2006
Saturday, Sunday.....darn.
Actually I'm glad to be going back to work. I don't do well trapped in the house and without money to spend there isn't much else to do. It's too cold to spend any time out anyway. Of course I've accomplished a lot indoors. I've pulled out, sorted, purged, painted, mended, adorned, and put back.....and just got crafty and inspired. ...of course I also did some reading, writing, tuning in to music and even just tuned it all out for some all out relaxation and much needed deep thinking time. And now, I'm exhausted and I want to go back to work. At work I just do what I do and no one expects much more. Except for me to be my happy self without talking too much. I think I'll just be anti-social instead. It's much easier.
So I'm ready.....
1.06.2006
Poetry
Today I was watching my boys playing together and was suddenly hit by a rush of emotion. I can't stand the thought of them growing up and leaving home. One thing that gives me confort is that I've worked hard at keeping my family close. I know my boys love each other and they love us. I know this family wont just drift apart.
Don’t grow up on me
Two big brown eyes
And two slightly smaller
Sparkled as laughter filled the room
My sister had the biggest smile
Mine only slightly smaller then.
I loved it when she curled my hair
And dressed me up and let me spin.
When I was just five
I couldn’t understand
Why when big sisters grow up
they get their own wings
And they fly away from home.
A sly grin and a can of pop
And brown hair like mine only shorter
My brother always looked so cool
He tore down hills on Dad’s 3 wheeler
but I always came out on top
‘Cause my brother always took good care of me
And beat up mean boys at the bus stop.
Then when I was 16 years old
I learned to understand
When big brothers grow up
they get their own wings
And they fly away from home.
Two big brown eyes
And two slightly larger
Toss baseballs out on the field
They jeer and then laugh
Slapping high fives in the air
They don’t know just what they’ve got
And It seems so unfair.
I’m not sure how old I’ll be
But I’ve learned to understand
Those boys will grow up and get their own wings
And fly away from home.
DC 1/6/2006
1.03.2006
Now I'm ready for 2006
Today I went to get my hair done and I feel great! I have been really bummed out because my hair is getting grayer. It really stands out at my part against my dark hair. So instead of just highlighting she added some color that is close to my natural color. NO MORE GREY HAIR! I have my regular low key caramel highlights like last time so I'm totally happy now ;O)
After that I went shopping and found some really great deals - which is always fun ;O) I found two sweaters that I almost bought last month on the clearance rack! They were $36 bucks each last month. Now they were marked down to $21 and clearance was 40% off plus I had a coupon for an additional 15% off :O) That's just awesome! It's funny that the very two that I wanted in the size I needed were still there on clearance. There were very few left. The two I got are brown and other neutral shades mixed with sky blue. It seems people liked the ones with pink better. Good :O)
Anyway, that certainly starts off my year wonderfully!
1.02.2006
DIY Network
Since I got a neat sewing machine for Christmas I've been trying to catch "Sew much more" which comes on at 9 am my time because of the 4 hour time difference. I keep missing it so my husband has it set to record every weekday :O) I've also been into the scrapbooking shows since I am planning to start my own and I really need help. My problem is I don't like clutter. I like to keep it plain and simple. I've been seeing some neat ways to make a main design on a page and then you can have little mini albums or envelopes with more photos tucked inside. Scrapbooking: Just Journaling with Sandi Genovese.
One of the idea's I saw today is available online in a PDF file: List-Style Journaling
I obviously love to journal. They had someone on today talking about these neat "circle journals". I have a friend (J) that I would love to do this with. She lives pretty far away and we have never met but we are pretty good friends. I think two of these (one for each) or something similar would be neat to pass back and forth!
www.Circlejourey.com